Who's to Blame?

When I was at the height of my addictive state it seemed like everywhere I turned there was something to satisfy my craving for some selfish desire. I would literally go several days influenced by some type of drug or alcohol. I was drinking at work, taking pills to stay awake at school, taking pills to fall asleep; it was everywhere and it seemed like I had total access. It was no different with the lust in my heart; the internet was always there, there where a couple of strip clubs in Waco and adult stores. It seemed that everywhere I turned there was something supplying a desire. Sins are not “out there” in the media, strip clubs, bars, dance clubs; they are not in the women who wear revealing clothing. The painful truth is that the sinfulness of our hearts that breed lust and sin is in “us.” This is explained by Jesus in Mark 7:21-22 “For from within, out of people’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immoralities, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, evil action, deceit, lewdness, stinginess, blasphemy, pride, and foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a person.”

The world has put so much into what qualifies as normal and abnormal behavior. If you have some sort of abnormality the world’s answer is a cure. When I was struggling with my grades in high school it was never my fault it was always the teachers. The thought never crossed my mind that it might have been because I didn’t study the material or do the assignments as the teacher directed. I blamed someone else. When I was going through the “dark” stages in my life I honestly thought that it was because everything was so readily available, there was a place to get everything and it seemed like people where ready to give it away. It never once crossed my mind that it was the unrestrained conduct and foolishness that came from within. It is so easy to blame someone or something else for our sin instead of “manning” up and admitting the problem we have with sin and repenting

According to Scripture Jesus is normal and without sin, that would make all of us abnormal sinners with indwelling sin. So that must mean that we are all abnormal because we all struggle with sin, right? Our lives are outward reflections of our hearts; our heart is the essence of who we are; which, is the expressions of ourselves through words and actions. When I said earlier that everything was readily available, well it was. I was attracting everything that my heart desired. My inner desires where to serve myself and indulge in every selfish desire that I could so I was getting exactly what I wanted.

We live in a culture that has become very sexually minded. In the 50’s and 60’s Playboy and Penthouse were stored behind the counter out of sight and you would have to ask for it with some type of secret code word or something. We see movies with full nudity and sex scenes played out in vivid color. We can just simply go to the movie rental place and the adult movies are on the top shelf in plain sight and men you know as well as I do it just takes a glance. (Matthew 5:28 “…everyone who looks at a women to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”) I heard a comment once by some guys about girls, they said that most girls these days have been with several people and it was hard to find a “good girl.” I responded with, “Why do you think they are like that?” Women truly don’t want to be treated like pieces of property or as men’s playgrounds. Women want to be loved and respected, women are God’s daughters and we must treat them as such. Why are the adult movies and magazines in plain sight? It’s because men have let the lust become part of life simply because it is legalized through the world. Again, our lust cannot be tolerated just because the world has said it is OK to indulge because everything is allowable and lawful for us but not all things are good for us to do; everything is lawful for us but we must not become the slave of anything or brought under its power (1Corinthians 6:12).

So where do we go from here? Our lives reflect what our hearts desire. When I finally stopped blaming people, situations, and circumstances and started looking to myself, I realized that I had only gotten what I went out searching for, when I started to take a serious inventory of the sin that had stacked up in my life I realized that my heart was so far from a reflection of Christ that it literally would make me sick. Most of the time I would turn right back to a bad habit, most of the time it was pornography because I could do that secretly. I still have a stack of sins that God is working with me on but I am proud to say that over the last year I have started to see the light. I have started to see that God has a plan for my life. A relationship with God is closer then you think, even in the worst state God is closer then you thought.

He is waiting. Be a Man.